LEAKED W.H. TAPE: U.S. to Become Communist Nation in January 2012

Additional changes will include the hammer and sickle on the U.S. flag, replacing the Bald Eagle with a picture of Barack Obama, and exchanging "Uncle Sam" for "Aunt Napolitano."

WASHINGTON – A leaked White House video dated from March 2011 shows the President and several union members agreeing that the United States will begin to transition into a full-fledged communist dictatorship in January 2012.

The tape features President Obama, union leader Andy Stern, actor Sean Penn, and three college students dressed in Appaman Revolutionary hats and Phish T-shirts. It explains the rationale for America’s sudden transition from economic powerhouse to a “worker’s paradise.”

“These Tea Partiers and Republicans talk about socialism and me being a dictator all the time…” said President Obama. “You know what? I say let’s do it. Let’s go all in.”

Moments later, one of the college students exclaimed, “They talk about socialism and Marxism so much it’s like they want you to enslave them, Mister President!”

“You’re right,” says the President. “Let’s do it. How’s January of next year work for everyone?” The group then nods and laughs before finishing a lunch of Clif Bars. The students then read poetry about income equality and the need for the United States to end domestic drilling.

The United States will become the sixth nation in the world that is officially communist following North Korea, The People’s Republic of China, the Republic of Vietnam, Cuba, and Laos. The President did not state whether he will request a change in title to something like “Dear Leader,” which the people of North Korea use to refer to Kim Jong-Il. On the video, Stern makes several suggestions, including “My General, Hero Leader, Doctor President, Mister America, and Mint Barry Crunch.”

The live leak of the tape was a bittersweet moment for conservative talk host Glenn Beck. “Don’t you see?” said Beck this morning on his radio show. “This finally vindicates me for all the crazy shit I’ve been talking about on my shows for the last few years. I was right about every single Nazi comparison, all the chalkboard talks, and each prediction about Americans suffering the same fate as the Russian peasants. While I am not looking forward to having to wear green mocks and eating grass every day, I do take some satisfaction in saying that I was correct, America. This is what you get when you vote for a professional vacationer.”

“I think this is a really great idea,” said Nancy Richmond, an art student at Georgetown University. “I’ve been living off my parents for some time now. It will be nice not have to worry about bills and food, you know? I can finally focus on my paintings of mice full time and quit that stupid waitressing job.”

The White House did not comment on Tuesday, as everyone was out buying new Che Guevara T-shirts.

click here for the controversial video

By Theodore Lost

Posted by on Jul 21 2011. Filed under Headlines. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

6 Comments for “LEAKED W.H. TAPE: U.S. to Become Communist Nation in January 2012”

  1. Gloriane

    Tip top stuff. I’ll epcxet more now.

  2. Allbright

    If it would only matter….

  3. AtlasObjectivist

    I expected nothing less. I will enjoy being a counter revolutionary and have been arming up since the radical liberal commies took office.

  4. tommy

    im kinda confused? is this true?

    • John Jones

      Read the bottom of the Web site.

      I’m not trying to insult you, but c’mon – be rational. Ignoring all the signs that this site is clearly a joke and taking the article on its own, this should still be easy – its nonsense. Use your head.

  5. jimmy

    what a communist bastard

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