Republicans Propose Amendment to Make Constitution More Like Wikipedia

"It's about time we turned the Constitution into a giant "Google Doc." Plus, no one except Joe Lieberman can read the handwriting anyway." - John Boehner
WASHINGTON—Politicians love to quote from the Constitution to support their arguments or label their opponents’ ideas as “unconstitutional.” Until now, all it took to justify or denounce these claims was to actually read the U.S. Constitution. The Republican Party hopes to change all of this by adding an amendment that would allow any person in government to change portions of the U.S. Constitution.
The Freedom of Constitutional Change Amendment, or the “The Wikipedia Amendment” as it is known in the Beltway, would permanently put the Constitution online. This would eliminate the need for such costly spending at The National Archives, which permanently houses the document. Chairman of the Republican National Committee Reince Priebus highlighted the fact that “things take too long nowadays in Washington. We should allow the people’s voices to be heard, and to be heard immediately.”
The logic of this Republican initiative is drawn from the policy used by Wikipedia, the online encyclopedia that allows all users to edit content. This would guarantee that regardless of the issue in question, the Republican Party would always be seen as acting “constitutionally,” since all they would have to do is submit an edit to an issue in question.
The amendment would also make the need for The Supreme Court, or any court, obsolete, since the laws would be subject to reasonable change every few seconds. Republicans and Democrats would constantly be fighting over liberal and conservative policies to establish which laws would appear in the online Constitution.
Speculation is already rising as to which party would be able to conquer the new technology and win the legislation battles should the new amendment pass. For instance, Sarah Palin has already demonstrated prowess on behalf of her party by explaining that Paul Revere actually warned the British that “the Americans were coming,” and not the other way around. If the amendment were to pass the only cause of a future government shutdown would be limited to a lack of bandwidth on the Constitutional website.
By Kenny Heidt