Kim Jong Eun Agrees to Play “Cartman” in Upcoming South Park Movie
By Chris McKerracher
PYONGYANG — As yet un-deposed Korean dictator for life, Kim Jong Un has signed a contract to play the role of Cartman in the live action South Park film slated to shoot this summer.
Kim was selected from an enormous field who auditioned for the role including Danny Devito, Jon Lovitz and righteous rapper and Dancing With The Stars contestant, Lil’ Kim (No relation to Kim Jong Eun.)
Studio officials claim that Jong Un’s audition, where he lambasted the catering staff for serving sub-standard kim-chee, went to the very essence of the Cartman character.
When contacted for reaction to the decision, Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park and voice of the original Cartman was ecstatic. “I can’t imagine anyone else with such a firm grasp of Cartman’s particular personality!” enthused Parker. “If only he was a little fatter.”
Sources inside the Korean government claim that, ever since Kim got word of the role during a surprise interview for an “Entertainment Tonight” segment, he begins all troop reviews with the words, “You WILL respect my authority!”