Sharpie Epidemic Among Homeless Still A Problem
By Steve Tobiasz
WASHINGTON – The epidemic that changed the homeless world forever turned thirty this year. Having begun in the late eighties, the Sharpie Epidemic has seen its ups and downs over the years. Below is a timeline of events for the Epidemic throughout its thirty year history.
May 2nd, 1982: CBS News first reports of a new epidemic among homeless community.
June 21st, 1982: State Department Declares epidemic a real threat to everyday people.
August 7th, 1982: President Ronald Reagan declares State of Emergency for everyday Americans; coins the name, “Sharpie Epidemic.”
February 12, 1987: Five years after Reagan’s announcement, a survey finds 94% of homeless Americans had been affected by the Sharpie Epidemic.
October 4th, 1994: Bill Clinton announces Epidemic Rates plummet to 54% thanks to his creation of middle-class jobs in the areas of Teaching, and Construction; creates the NSEC (National Sharpie Epidemic Center).
December 9th, 1998: The Sharpie Epidemic beats out AIDS as the Top Epidemic of the past Century.
January 8th, 2002: A study conducted from Rutgers University reveals the Sharpie Epidemic rate declines to 24% as college students discover drawing on friends while passed out.
May 2nd, 2002: George Bush gives speech on 20th Anniversary of the Sharpie Epidemic; claims he is surprised the epidemic has lasted this long, given the percentage of homeless that are black and therefore illiterate.
July 8th, 2002: Epidemic number increases to 56%, many believe in response to Bush’s remarks; protests in 38 states are started and the NSEC announces the creation of first ever Sharpie Fleece.
November 23rd, 2006: Rate of homeless affected drops to 12%, an all-time low; many believe this was facilitated by Sharpie sales doubling among Democrats due to Anti-War Protests.
March 28th, 2009: President Obama announces Sharpie rate dips below 12% after the Bailout, which puts more homeless Americans back to work fixing roads and bridges due to the lack of interest in the jobs from everyday out-of-work citizens.
May 2nd, 2012: The CDC declares the Sharpie Epidemic back on the rise as many homeless fear a Romney Presidency and are “planning for the future” by stocking up on Sharpies now.
Currently the Sharpie Epidemic is said to be affecting 38% of the homeless Americans. President Obama has declared May 2nd to be “National Sharpie Awareness Day” and plans on handing out cardboard to some 50,000 plus homeless in his home city of Chicago.
For more information visit NSEP.com or one of the 5 current nation-wide National Sharpie Epidemic Centers
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